Z’Blog

When the soap opera that is Indiana University men’s basketball finally gasps to its inevitable losing conclusion, fans will look back on this season as the biggest nightmare in Hoosier hoops history. Working from a playbook that would do Shakespeare proud, this IU season was foretold two years ago when the IU AD, looking for a cheap fix to replace the questionably departed Mike Davis, hired long time Oklahoma coach Kelvin Sampson at a bargain basement price.

Pummeled by 3 years of Davis’ mediocre coaching and social paranoia, the Hoosier Nation was more than willing to overlook Sampson’s record of low (if not aberrant) player graduation rates, a continual Juco parade of 2 and done players and shadowy recruiting tactics. Those were desperate times as Indiana sought to revive a program still bruised from the Coach Knight firing and Davis’ hiring.

 After a respectable first season ending with a low scoring loss to UCLA in the tournament, IU fans were suitably impressed by Coach Sampson’s on court abilities and off court recruiting skills. Yet in the back of every knowledgeable fan’s mind was this “Jury’s still out” feeling about Sampson as the man worthy to carry IU’s spotless basketball tradition forward.

This hesitation was realized when Sampson, unable to live up to his promise, fell back on the cell phone sword that preceded him to IU. The NCAA announcement of major violations for Indiana thanks to Sampson threw a pall over the entire program, the school, its alums and fans.

 Until Sampson threw 40 years of excellence away, IU had always stood for doing college athletics the right way. Our kids graduated, stayed 4 years, liked their team mates, respected their coach and represented all that’s good in college sports.

Today the IU basketball program is a smashed shell of one time greatness, epitomized by lackadaisical play, practice eruptions, dissension and a former IU player now coach whose face wears the agony of the season.

IU goes to Raleigh, NC to face a huge Arkansas team intent on beating up the Hoosiers in every way. The NCAA committee’s tournament seed of #8 basically indicated their feeling that IU was the #32 team in the nation. The underlying sentiment being the NCAA was punishing IU in advance of their June trial for infractions.

What happens now will be settled on the floor. For many, we wish for a quick conclusion to the season with hopes that Indiana will begin to rebuild their program and reputation with a new coach with no baggage and players who want to play for the glory of old IU - not the initials on their shoes of a cheating, lying fool who threw away the best opportunity any coach could have in college basketball.

2:23am Tuesday -

 Hello, EJ, it’s me Coach! Wassup dog!?

Sure I know what time it is! It’s time for you to come with me to Chico State!

Aw c’mon Eric, I can’t coach the Chiclettes without you! You’re my ticket back into coaching, dude. You’ll love Division III hoops…no rules, run n’ gun offense…

What? You say you should of gone to Illinois? I ruined your college career? I took the spotlight away from you? EJ, my man, you’re being way cruel here - it’s all the NCAA’s fault…they hate us Coharie Indians, you know.

 Lose your number? Oh don’t be that way….hello?

Hellooo….(click)

       ________________________________________________

Coach Sampson’s study, 6:23am, Wednesday -

“Hi, Mrs. Washington, it’s me - gonna be again Coach Sampson. How’s the mother of the nation’s tallest 9th grader this bright, shiny morning? Is Othelle there? I wanted to say hello….

I know what time it is, Ma’am, he hasn’t left for school has he? Middle school doesn’t start ’til 8am…

But Mrs. Washington, I’m recruiting Othelle now, to get ahead of the other schools. I figure he’ll be a high school senior about the same time the NCAA allows me back into the coaching game.

What d’ya mean, an ethical coach for your son? I just got caught…well, caught twice…well, I lied, too…but, but…

Mrs. Washington? Hellooooo….

(click)

____________________________________________________________

Coach Sampson’s study, Wednesday 11:25am -

“Hello, Athletic Director Jones, this is a really great basketball coach who shall remain anonymous calling about your basketball program at New Jersey Institute of Engineering?…

 Yes, I noticed the team went 0-29 this past year and I’d like to bring them back to greatness. It’s a specialty of mine…

What? Y’say, you’ve never been great. Your students and alum really don’t care and you only have basketball to fulfill athletic curriculum requirements? That’s PERFECT - just the right situation for me…

 Well, for starters, I can recruit real good basketball players. Guys with suspicious transcripts from roundball academies, who’ll be here for a year, tear down your graduation rate, get busted for pot, rape coeds and all the other stuff you’d expect from a quick fix program.

You only recruit really smart engineering students who are athletes second? You’re kidding….aren’t you?

Uh, the NCAA? Sure, I know those scum-sucking pigs who destroyed my life just because I broke a teensy weensy rule…again….and again.

No, this isn’t Coach Sampson…who’s he?

Hello….Director Jones…Hellooo

(click)

__________________________________________________

Wednesday, 5:23pm, Coach Sampson’s study -

“Hello, may I speak to a Mr. Sleazy Martin, commissioner of the Northwest United Basketball League?

I am? Great! I’m just the guy to coach in your league! You want tough? You want fire? You want total disregard? That’s me!!

Play against a donkey basketball team? You betcha! A Hooters Girl point guard night? We’ll pack ‘em in Tahoma! Let a fan play in a game? Wow - that’ll thrill ‘em in Billings! That greased pig wrestling is a great idea, too. I’m all about throwing out the rules for the good of the game!

Experience? I have decades - all over the NCAA division 1 map. Rules violations, allegations, zip graduation rates - I’m the total package. Y’ever check that little mess I spawned at Indiana University? Yep…that’s me!

Y’say, your daughter went to IU business school? You went there, too? You’re a Hoosier alum?

What d’ya mean you hate me and what I did to your university?? It’s all show-biz, Mr. Sleazy…

Hello….Helloooo?

(click)

It’s been 4 days since Sampson Gate first was revealed to the IU faithful. That this man who was given another chance, the opportunity to coach on of the nation’s unarguably premiere college basketball programs  - would throw it all away with his sociopathic disgregard for NCAA rules, his probation and the pride of all Indiana University students, grads and fans. IU has always stood for fair play, honest, ethics, character and basketball played the way it should be. That Sampson would come in and violate these tenets is testimony to his stupidity and glaring lack of moral fiber.

A cheater. A liar. Called these names by none other than the NCAA.

 Yet Sampson stays irresolute, refusing to acknowledge his transgressions. Refusing to do the right thing by resigning amidst a sorrowful confession of unjust zeal and overeagerness. Too late now. Way too late. Instead backpedaling (uh, I hired him along with whole bunch of other people) AD Rick Greenspan now searches for the fastest and cheapest exit route for the now exposed charlatan of a coach he championed as the next great leader of IU basketball.

 How miserable all IU fans feel about this whole episode. We will, of course, survive and rise to greatness again. Only this time, I pray it’ll be greatness based on the foundation and legacy that made IU basketball one of the shining examples of what can be done with an honest vision for sport in college.

Sure, I’m a Colts fan so last year’s Super Bowl victory couldn’t have been better. But this year’s Super Bowl Champs - the NY Giants - come in a close second by throttling Bill Belicheat and the smug Patriots in a game everyone (except NY) believed would be an easy win for New England.

 Not so, oh pigskin experts. Instead, the Giants’ brand of smash-mouth defense kept pretty boy, bastard spawner Tom Brady on his back most of the game while Aw Shucks QB Eli Manning came of age in front of the largest TV audience to ever watch a Super Bowl.

While I couldn’t be happier for Eli and the Giants, my glee was heightened by the thought of those cocky Patriots (who had already trademarked 19-0) heading back to Beantown to the cold shoulders of their even cockier fans. Guess the ticker tape parade (planned last month) won’t be happening this year. And maybe not for many years to come as the Pats cobbled together a team of free agents, older players and miscreants intent on blasting through the NFL season to another Super Bowl victory. Many of the Pats (Seau, Harrison, Light, Brusci, etc) were playing on their last pro legs and won’t be back - or will never equal their physical prowess.

I do hope the NFL slaps the Hoodie and lots of other Holier Than Thou Patriot management and coaches with suspensions, lost draft choices and big money fines for their second round of VideoGate. Belichek’s gruff personality and smug arrogance leaves little doubt he believes he’s above the rules and better than the rest of the NFL coaches. To see him publicly scorned would be the proverbial cherry on top of the Patriots’ Loser Sundae - they served up Sunday.

 Alan Ladd in Shane. Clint Eastwood in High Plains Drifter, the Duke in Rio Bravo - all cowboy heros who rode off into the sunset at the end of the movie.

Bob Knight is a modern day cowboy hero. A maverick who told it like he saw it, suffered no fools, did things his way and always appeared to be a coach better suited for bygone NCAA days when players played 4 years, obeyed the coach, believed in the concept of team play and went about their business with no fanfare. Kinda like the 1976 Indiana team that went 32-0 and won the NCAA Championship. This was a team of selfless players, each one willing to step up his game wherever it was needed for the good of the team. Some may have called them robots - but to see them run the motion offense with the last player scoring an uncontested basket - it was a beautiful sight not seen much today in NCAA hoops unless you watch the smaller schools (Xavier, Butler, Gonzaga, etc) whose seniors stay to play and thus have a total team chemistry unmatched by one and done players.

I cannot say I’ll miss Bobby Knight as the game appeared to pass him by 10 years ago. His dictatorial, obey me at any cost coaching style has faded into today’s GQ dressed coaches who plead with their players rather than direct them.

I do hold him and Miles Brand responsible for acting like petulant first graders that led to Knight’s dismissal at IU. Coach should have stayed at IU until he retired, leaving behind a legacy the same as Dean Smith at UNC. Instead, Coach Knight took his act to Texas Tech - out in the middle of nowhere cowboy country - where he cobbled together winning seasons in relative obscurity.

Now the old cowboy has hung up his coaching spurs and saddled up for the next great journey, probably lots of hunting, shooting, fishing and other long ago manly pursuits. He may show up on a NCAA final show for expert commentary or be seen at a fund-raising golf outing. Maybe he’ll hang out with Parcells in Miami as an unpaid adviser. I don’t see him over the shoulder of son, Pat - whose trial by fire comes now in the last 10 games of the season.

Nope, I’m thinking the last of the cowboy coaches will just….fade away, a speck on the horizon painted golden by the sunset. Thanks for the ride, Coach Knight. I only hoped it would have ended in Bloomington, Indiana.

As if serving more to blot out the memory of the Colt’s crushing loss to San Diego, this past week all of Indianapolis and most of the NFL sports press held their collective breath as Coach Tony Dungy went into familial introspection to decide his return or not to coach the team with whom he has two years remaining on his $5million a year contract.

 Hypocrite or not? Saint with a higher calling or leader of finely tuned physical athletes designed to win football games? Regardless of his intent, I take umbrage with Coach Dungy seeming to ignore his contractual obligations with the Colts. The man signed on through the 2009 season. He agreed to a contract. He should not be allowed second thoughts.

That being said I wonder if any and all coaches of major sports teams don’t all have some sort of introspective, why am I doing this days after the end of any season. Even those championship winning coaches must sit back after the hooplah ends and wonder, “Why not quit when I’m at the top?”

The ongoing spotlight on any sport via networks, blogs, web sites and you tube clips leaves little room for personal times. Any sports athlete, coach or owner is fair game for the sports press, who nowadays come with their own versions of Perez Hilton, Entertainment Tonight type reporting.

In economic crunch times like these with a war going on with a faceless enemy, sports idolatry ramps up as escapism flourishes. Every nuance, every police report, every injury and every false assault/rape charge is trumpeted before a teeming audience ripe for any tidbit true or false.

 Is Coach Dungy the right man to lead the Colts next year? You betcha. Because after questioning his yearly sabbatical of self reaffirmation, you inevitably come to the undeniable conclusion that every season with Tony Dungy at the helm of our NFL team is a season assured of class, dignity, hard work, focus and vision. What else could a fan, a team or a franchise want from their player’s leader and inspiration.

 Welcome back again, Coach Dungy. Enjoy your stay and thank you for being here in Indianapolis, regardless of how long being here will turn out to be.

First off, know that I like the Indianapolis Colts. I like their players, their coaches, their owners and all that they’ve done to put Indy on the big sports map.

 That being said, I also believe the Colts have become the Atlanta Braves of the NFL. Always a winning season, most always a surprisingly tank performance in the playoffs. The Colts loss to San Diego pretty much says it all when you consider the injuries to the Charger’s main players - their QB and All Pro RB - during the game.

The will to win comes from somewhere deep inside every player. And the Colts may not have this deep reserve.

Why? I’m wondering if the Mr. Nice Guy routine of Coach Tony Dungy doesn’t somehow permeate the team fiber and make them a bunch of “nice guys”, solid citizens who show up as pussies when the smash-mouth violence of NFL playoff games comes a calling.

Sure, Tony’s a saint, a great person, a spiritually inclined man with a higher purpose ahead. All great traits for living your life but not necessarily what it takes to win in the NFL. While Tony didn’t drop passes, fumble the ball or not get to Billy Voleck fer Chrissakes on the rush, his calm and unruffled demeanor did nothing to kick start the Colts into realizing they were playing passive the entire game.

Now we read that Tony’s once-again pondering retirement and not returning to the Colts for the 2008 season. I say, if you’re not 1000% committed - and he’s not - then hang it up now and let the team find another coach who can light the fire under the collective butts of the Colts nice guy roster.

Bill HoodieCheck is a smug, arrogant, non-communicative, manipulative weasel of a person. He’s also the best coach in the NFL. I’m not interested in having dinner with Belichek or reading a book of his spiritual journey. Instead, I admire the steely professionalism he’s instilled in every Patriot player. The Pats play ALL 60 minutes of every game this year. They play like seasoned pros; humble yet confident in action, committed and focused, smart and calm.

On the other hand, the Colts tend to run around and short circuit when the going gets tough. When they don’t go out and score bunches of points right away, it’s as if they cannot believe it. They’ve been beaten up front and in the red zone whenever they choke their way out of the playoffs.

In the off season, I hope Coach Dungy will take a hike back to Tampa and follow his next path. I hope the Colts hire a new coach with a different personality, one with a rumbling volcano inside who won’t accept losing and will lambast his players for not giving their all - every time in any game.

I never liked the Atlanta Braves and always laugh when they fade in the playoffs. I can’t help but wonder if NFL fans feel the same about the Colts.

The only constant in life is change. Change would be a good thing for the Colts head coach. Gimme some fire!!!

Ho Ho Hollo!

As it ‘Tis the Season, I thought I’d share some Holiday Cheer with all.

First, click on this link for a ska holiday tune…

    http://www.lapostmusic.com/Emarketing/Clip_Of_The_Week/LAPM039-06/index_2.php  

 Then prepare to whip up this holiday cookie favorite in our household:

 Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies:
 
1    cup of  water
1    tsp  baking soda
1    cup of  sugar
1    tsp  salt
1    cup of  brown sugar
1    cup lemon  juice
4    large  eggs
1    cup  nuts
2    cups of  dried fruit
1    bottle  Jose Cuervo Tequila
 
Sample the Cuervo to check  quality.  Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo
again, to be sure it is of  the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
 
Turn on the electric  mixer…Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
 
Add one teaspoon of  sugar…Beat again.  At this point it’s best to make
sure the Cuervo is  still OK, try another cup….just in case.
 
Turn off the mixerer  thingy.  Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in
the cup of dried  fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor….while sipping Cuervo.
 
Mix on the turner.  If  the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry
it loose with a  drewscriver.  Sample the Cuervo to check for  tonsisticity.
 
Next, shift two cups of salt, or something.  Who giveshz a sheet.  Check
the Jose Cuervo…again.   Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.  Add one
table.    Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.  Whatever you can  find. S’fine…
 
Greash the oven. Shock the monkey. Turn  the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. 
Don’t forget to beat off the turner.  Finally, throw the bowl through the
window, finish the  Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the  dishwasher,
 
Serve  yosefl…..Cherry Mistmas

Next is a should-be classic holiday video - featuring Leon Redbone - thanks to Lesley: http://gpsinformation.info/main/merryxmas.swf

NEXT - Vote here for your choice of the WORST CHRISTMAS SONG Ever!

 The nominees are:

13: “All I want for Christmas is You” Mariah Carey (She’s singing into a mirror….)
12. “Santa Claus go straight to the ghetto” James Brown (holiday social commentary..)
11. “A Wonderful Christmas time,” Paul McCartney (1 finger piano)
10.”Jingle Bell Rock - Bobby Helms (sure he’s a Hoosier, but the song grates…)
9. “Christmas don’t be late” -

 Feel free to submit your own entrants….

 Best Holiday CDs you might not know….

 Worst holiday video - Back Street Boys http://youtube.com/watch?v=ykRelehy7M0

 Christmas trends that should be outlawed…

 - E-Holiday Cards (an email of Christmas cheer - smells like Noel Spam to me)

- Christmas bows, ornaments on front grilles of cars - (Say it loud, I’m Christmasy and proud)

- Alternatives to Christmas Celebrations (Hey,

- Politically Correct

- Psychedelic blinking outdoor holiday lights (Flashback redux)

- Family newsletters in holiday cards from people you barely know (like I care your Aunt Millie got a new kidney..)

- Vegan holiday party appetizer spreads (what? no little sausages?)

- Any use Xmas - it’s CHRISTmas!

- Re-gifting (please, don’t pass along that Chia Pet to me)

- Rating bad Christmas songs

OK, that’s it for now - Joy to Your World!!

Today’s weather read like a bad romance novel - cloudy, cold rain spitting - a indoors day with minimum travel. Instead, Zionsville hosted their annual Christmas in the Village parade where the high school band, a miniature train, store made floats and marching german shepherd dogs lead Zanta and Mrs Claus down our quaint cobblestone street. Our dogs, Boudreaux and Dominique, led the parade, side by side as it their life together. The rain parted to a fine, glasses fogging mist as we made the 6 block walk and waved, while behind the Love Furniture Grinch Stole A Couch float.

Meanwhile the BCS committe put their heads together and came up with the logical choices for their Championship Game with lots of juicy match-ups for the college football fan.  

Illinois/USC Rose Bowl - should be fun for the first half when USC’s size, talent and west coast offense will wear down the Illini 31-17.  OSU vs USC would have been a boring game. Watch for Illinois pairing up with Florida in one of next year’s big time BCS match-ups.

Oklahoma/WVirginia Fiesta Bowl - Oklahoma is a young team that peaked at the end of the season, after getting shelled by TexTech. West Virginia defense is scrappy but won’t contain Sooner running back and freshman no more QB. Stop the Mountaineers’ QB and you stop their offense  Oklahoma (watch out for them in ‘08) wins 28-17

Georgia/Hawaii Sugar Bowl - Cinderella stays too late at the ball as man-handling Bulldogs say welcome to the South with smashmouth D and relentless running plays. Too small Hawaii lines can’t stay the course and late rally doesn’t come in time. Brennan’s physical strength a big factor after a couple of SEC sacks. Georgia 27 -14.

Virginia Tech/Kansas Orange Bowl - ACC without a prominent FSU is a borderline als0-ran conference. All sentiment aside, this year VaTech would be a middle of the pack contender in major conference. Kansas wowed their fans but not the rest of the nation with their less than impressive loss to Missouri - compounded by the dual spankings Mizzoo suffered from Boomer Sooners. Could be the New Year’s Day take a nap special - Rock Chalk Jayhawks 35-28

LSU/OSU BCS Bowl - I confess to watching 8 LSU games this year in glowing High Def and admit I like their team and their coach’s style of play.

I also saw 3-4 Ohio State games and did feel this squad was national championship caliber - but that’s the BCS job, not mine. We’ll take this game as probably the best match-up you could glean from the topsy turvy season.

OK, here’s my take on OSU. I was less and less impressed with the Buckeye offense as the season wore on. Buckeye QB is really suspect and doesn’t play catch-up ball at all. Rotating tandem backs only works if your O Line knows their blocking assignments. Too many offensive plays where the back was stuffed. Don’t appear to have more than 1 good long receiver. And you’ll need a good receiver or four when playing catch up ball to an LSU outfit with a team of defensive backfield assasins who really tackle hard and mean.

 Defensively, the Buckeyes are big up front and should give LSU some up the middle problems with runs. Linebackers are their big strength, forcing LSU to cut back on their dump passes and short gain end arounds. I think the Tigers’ money plays lie in long passes to any of their receivers - especially Byrd and Lafell.

LSU offense ebbs and flows. QB Matt Flynn is the cool leader while Ryan Perriloux has a cannon for an arm but not a whole lot of discipline. RBs are functional but not exceptional. Hester is a dependable workhorse who can block, catch and run around or, his preference, up the middle. As above, the receiving corps for LSU can be a big factor. They’ve gotten better with every game.

So - who’s the champ? This should be a pretty decent game, not that high scoring and lots of fun in the trenches. Look for some trick plays on both sides, a possible run-back or interception for TD could make all the difference. In my heart, I’m feeling LSU. In my head, I’d never underestimate the Buckeys. But I’ll GEAUX WITH LSU - 24-17!

Defensively, if monster DT Glenn Dorsey knee is healthy, OSU QB will be in for a night of pain. Dorsey will demand at least 2 blockers allowing other behemoth and quick LSU linemen like Jackson and Pittman to run amok in the backfield.

The Big Ten Network is driving me to drink! Because the network isn’t offered on my cable system and I cannot get a dish placed on my property (heavy forest & hilltop location), I’m forced to go to a local pub - preferrably the Cobblestone Grill in Zionsville - to watch 14 IU basketball games that aren’t available on my home TV.

No more curling up on the couch. No more warm nights at home. This winter, if I’m going to watch the Hoosiers, I have to head out in the cold, plop down on a less than comfy bar stool and try to hear the play by play at the bar.

 Perhaps this is a plot by both the networks and beer distributors to get sports fans back into bars?

Also, the quality of the Big Ten Network’s telecasts really suck. Lousy camera angles, slow replays and NO HDTV! The announcers are a bunch of regional network drones who lend no excitement to the games, don’t sound like they’ve done their homework and are basically boring.  Even the commercials are boring.

I went out and watched the Packers/Cowboys game on the NFL Network last night - another network my cable system doesn’t offer and felt the same about the lousy telecast.  If these new sports networks are going to gouge us for more $$ to watch their programming, why don’t they put some of those bucks back into their broadcasts?

This “Take it or Leave it” attitude by the Big 10 and NFL networks gives no doubt it’s all about the Benjamins when it comes to college and pro sports. We are all fools to believe there’s such a thing as team loyalty to its fans.

Lucid reflections of