Christmas thoughts
Ho Ho Hollo!
As it ‘Tis the Season, I thought I’d share some Holiday Cheer with all.
First, click on this link for a ska holiday tune…
http://www.lapostmusic.com/Emarketing/Clip_Of_The_Week/LAPM039-06/index_2.php
Then prepare to whip up this holiday cookie favorite in our household:
Jose Cuervo Christmas Cookies:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
1 cup lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila
Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo
again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Turn on the electric mixer…Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar…Beat again. At this point it’s best to make
sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup….just in case.
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in
the cup of dried fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor….while sipping Cuervo.
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry
it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.
Next, shift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet. Check
the Jose Cuervo…again. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one
table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. S’fine…
Greash the oven. Shock the monkey. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the
window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher,
Serve yosefl…..Cherry Mistmas
Next is a should-be classic holiday video - featuring Leon Redbone - thanks to Lesley: http://gpsinformation.info/main/merryxmas.swf
NEXT - Vote here for your choice of the WORST CHRISTMAS SONG Ever!
The nominees are:
13: “All I want for Christmas is You” Mariah Carey (She’s singing into a mirror….)
12. “Santa Claus go straight to the ghetto” James Brown (holiday social commentary..)
11. “A Wonderful Christmas time,” Paul McCartney (1 finger piano)
10.”Jingle Bell Rock - Bobby Helms (sure he’s a Hoosier, but the song grates…)
9. “Christmas don’t be late” -
8. “Santa Claus Is Coming to Town,” Bruce Springsteen (Sounds like he’s constipated)
7. “Jingle Bells” Tie between Barbra Streisand and those Barking Dogs (whose the real dog here?)
6. “Grandma got run over by a reindeer” Elmo & Patsy (Hear it once, never again…)
5. “Snoopy’s Christmas,” Royal Guardsmen (A real barker)
4. “Nuttin for Christmas” Art Mooney & his Orchestra (If I had a kid with that weasel voice, he’d get nuttin)
3. “Rockin’ around the Christmas Tree” Brenda Lee (#1 Helium voice)
2. “Feliz Navidad” Jose Feliciano (Tejano rock & the holidays don’t mix)
1. “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Band Aid (65 voices - all out of tune)
Feel free to submit your own entrants….
Best Holiday CDs you might not know….
Worst holiday video - Back Street Boys http://youtube.com/watch?v=ykRelehy7M0
Christmas trends that should be outlawed…
- E-Holiday Cards (an email of Christmas cheer - smells like Noel Spam to me)
- Christmas bows, ornaments on front grilles of cars - (Say it loud, I’m Christmasy and proud)
- Alternatives to Christmas Celebrations (Hey,
- Politically Correct
- Psychedelic blinking outdoor holiday lights (Flashback redux)
- Family newsletters in holiday cards from people you barely know (like I care your Aunt Millie got a new kidney..)
- Vegan holiday party appetizer spreads (what? no little sausages?)
- Any use Xmas - it’s CHRISTmas!
- Re-gifting (please, don’t pass along that Chia Pet to me)
- Rating bad Christmas songs
OK, that’s it for now - Joy to Your World!!